1995 Mike Figi

Mike is one of the most likeable, jokester, happy guys that you could meet. He was quick with a practical joke and a friendly slap on the back for encouragement. He was a total nutcase at parties and a pretty good salesman. I once remember him introducing a friend to another person by giving his friend the entirely wrong identity for the person. It took longer than Mike or anyone would have thought, it was hilarious to watch the entire conversation, it was painful to watch the person look queerly at Mike’s friend but boy did Mike enjoy it.

I heard him say once a few years ago while kidding around, “You know me, I can’t go along with anything.” It was bad. In open meetings, the senior pastor and the senior leaders would try and try to answer him but the questions and opposition would keep going. His best friends would stand up, tease him publicly and ask him to stop. It was without question the most severe case of “I just have to say it” that I have ever seen.

Mike wasn’t being funny. Mike wasn’t being mean. Mike just had to have something to say and even if there was nothing incredibly important to say he would create an “important” question or have a big discussion. I don’t know if he did this at home or if they teased him if he did it at work. If he did it at home it worked because his kids turned out really well and, other than rolling her eyes a lot, his wife seems really happy with Mike. I think if he did it at work, they would have locked him in a closet so they could get something done.

We were all young then, full of quirks – growing up as parents and leaders. Mike might be totally different in this area today. But for every Mike who has grown up or moved away, there has always been a replacement. Many of them are young but a few never seem to get older and have never outgrown the trait. Some of the older have learned to hold their “have to” thoughts in public meetings. Some of those still weak in this area have learned to sit on their hands during staff and group meetings. Some have not ever stopped “having to say something” to anyone who would listen in a break room, bathroom or hallway.

I remember getting annoyed and then realizing that before I was in ministry, a younger staff of mine pointed out this very same trait in me. I remember those days where deep inside you got antsy and excited and nervous and just “knew that you had to say it.” I have learned that most of the times when I feel that way I should shut up. Nervous words can be dangerous words and “have to feeling” words have deceived me many times. As well, just talking to be part of a decision is such a waste and restating it only makes us look silly as we say “I thought of it toooo.”

Every time I think I have to speak, I think of Mike and then I ask – do I need to say something God? Many times silence allows a situation to answer itself but if not when the situation falls silent it is much easier to speak. Rarely do our words as “leaders” fix anything but God’s wise words aged in the heart answer much.

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